It has been a
while since I actually penned down something. A lot has changed ever since my
last blog (Life out of a suitcase). Writing, to me, was everything about
sharing my fears, inhibitions, and perspectives. It was a channel to my
feelings. Some understood some did not. There hasn’t been a particular reason
that I can point out for my sabbatical from doing something that gives me
innate joy. However, things have changed and some that I may not even be happy
about.
Nevertheless,
here I am, back to doing what I feel I was not extremely poor at. Does it
really matter even if I was? Come to think of it, one of the many reasons I
never felt the need to write was because I found a human diary. Recently when I
re-visited my previous blog is when I found the connection. There is a friend, a close friend (co-blogger), whom I made a promise. Amongst our various
discussions about food, photography, traveling and blogging, I mentioned to
him that I write about people and life experiences, frustrated of his constant
bullying (yes, he can be trouble), I passed a comment that I would probably
need a full page blog to describe him. I made a promise to write about him
before the end of 2018. (Yes, I know it's 2019). Little did I know, I probably
need a lifetime to do so.
That’s the irony, this close friend (now my husband), my human diary, now makes me want to
complete my ‘Life of a suitcase’. While I was trying to find a house, (literally,
I hate shifting), I found a ‘home’. Am I living out of a suitcase,
still? Probably. Do I feel like I belong somewhere, Definitely! I started
writing the first blog wondering if Canada would ever be home and my journey
towards trying to find and build one. Here, I am, nearly two years later,
convinced, that home is not a place, it is a person, a feeling and an emotion.
I know you’re
wondering, what is the point of this blog? Is it about my sabbatical, my life
in Canada or this person I call home? It is actually about the unpredictability
of life and the weird connection and sequence of events in my life. (Also, a
little bit about keeping my promise)
Who would
have thought that I would fall in love with a person who ‘bro-zoned’ me! For people
who know me even a little bit, know that I was the most Anti-marriage person.
From that to being one of the first people amongst my close circuit to tie the
knot, it has been quite a journey in itself. That is the unpredictability of life.
You not only do not have control of factors external to you, but you also do not
have control of who you become. Situations, circumstances, and life changes you.
One of the most important people in my life, the one who made me believe in the
institution of marriage, wasn’t there to walk me down the aisle. A dream every
girl, even an emotionally non-existent girl deep down her heart has. That has
been my biggest takeaway from the past year or so.
Life is
unpredictable, you have this one second you’re living right now to do what
makes you happy. So why stop yourself? Why restrict yourself to numbers and
barriers society set for you. People often say you have one life, live it to
the fullest. No, you die only once, you live every day. So stop living towards
the feeling that everyone has to die one day, you’re killing yourself a little every day by stopping yourself from being who you truly are.
My journey
from living a life out of a suitcase to finding my pieces in another person to
complete the puzzle of my life and start a new one, it has been a rollercoaster. Am
I any less ambitious than I used to be? 200%, NO. People think they need to
achieve everything before a certain time and then ‘settle down’ later. What
really is this ‘settle down’? I have a person who believes in my dreams and
capabilities far more than I do myself. How can the person who understands my
over-obsessive need to excel at everything I do, ever be the one who makes me ‘compromise’
on my career? Being married, having a high paying job or an elite house doesn’t
mean you settled down. You settle down when you stop yourself from growing and
living. A man or anybody for the matter of fact, does not have the ability to
stop you. So refrain from blaming the external factors.
If you still
don’t believe me, I’d say don’t. Because if someone had said this to the old me,
I would ask them to be happy in their bubble and leave me alone (Yes, I was
pretty defensive of my point of views).
All I have to
say is, don’t let your life be ruled by standards of what society has set for
you. You don’t have to have a million dollars before you die or a mansion
before you raise kids or be the CEO of the company before you get married or
graduate at the age of 21. Do what makes you happy. Do something that makes you feel alive every day. I learned this the hard way, by losing the most important
man in my life and finding the other most important man in my life.
That’s my
version of Life out of a suitcase 2.0. Along with my overflowing suitcase that was
always filled with dreams, aspirations, ambitions and my over-enthusiasm; I
decided to make a ‘little space’ in my suitcase for love. Trust me, it hasn’t
taken away space from my ‘big dreams’; it has only made them
stronger and my smile a lot wider.
 |
| To the person who makes me laugh a little louder and love a little harder ♥️ |
